Topics for oral and written composition. 1.Character sketches of a) Lulu, the Duchess of Dulver- ton; b) Vasco Honiton.
1.Character sketches of a) Lulu, the Duchess of Dulver- ton; b) Vasco Honiton.
2.Explain the title of the story.
3.The story of the galleon.
4.The part the Duchess might have played in Billy Yuttley's suicide.
5.The author's attitude to the characters of the story.
6.Explain why Vasco Honiton decided to name his villa the Sub-Rosa.
W. SOMERSET MAUGHAM
JANE
I remember very well the occasion on which I first saw Jane Fowler. It is indeed only because the details of the glimpse I had of her then are so clear that I trust my recollection at all, for, looking back, I must confess that I find it hard to believe that it had not played me a fantastic trick. I had lately returned to London from China and was drinking a dish of tea with Mrs Tower.
I had no notion what her age was. When I was quite a young man she was a married woman a good deal older than I, but now she treated me as her contemporary. She constantly said that she made no secret of her age, which was forty, and then added with a smile that all women took five years off. She never sought to conceal the fact that she dyed her hair (it was a very pretty brown with reddish tints), and she said she did this because hair was hideous while it was going grey; as soon as hers was white she would cease to dye it.
"Then they'll say what a young face I have."
Meanwhile it was painted, though with discretion, and her eyes owed not a little of their vivacity to art. She was a handsome woman, exquisitely gowned, and in the sombre glow of the alabaster lamps did not look a day more than the forty she gave herself.
"It is only at my dressing-table that I can suffer the naked brightness of a thirty-two-candle electric bulb," she added with smiling cynicism. "There I need it to tell me first the hideous truth and then to enable me to take the necessary steps to correct it."
We gossiped pleasantly about our common friends and Mrs Tower brought me up to date in the scandal of the day. After roughing it here and there it was very agreeable to sit in a comfortable chair, the fire burning brightly on the hearth, charming tea-things set out on a charming table, and talk with this amusing, attractive woman. She treated me as a prodigal returned from his husks1 and was disposed to make much of me. She prided herself on her dinner-parties; she took no less trouble to have guests suitably assorted than to give them excellent food; and there were few persons who did not look upon it as a treat to be bidden2 to one of them. Now she fixed a date and asked me whom I would like to meet.
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"There's only one thing I must tell you. If Jane Fowler is still here I shall have to put it off."
"Who is Jane Fowler?" I asked.
Mrs Tower gave a rueful smile
"Jane Fowler is my cross."
"Oh!"
"Do you remember a photograph that 1 used to have on the piano of a woman in a tight dress with tight sleeves and a gold locket, with hair drawn back from a broad forehead and her ears showing and spectacles on a rather blunt nose? Well, that was Jane Fowler."
"Well who is Jane Fowler?" I asked again, smiling
"She's my sister-in-law She was my husband's sister and she married a manufacturer in the North. She's been a widow for many years, and she's very well-to-do."
"And why is she your cross?"
"She's worthy, she's dowdy, she's provincial. She looks twenty years older than I do and she's quite capable of telling anyone she meets that we were at school together. She has an overwhelming sense of family affection and because I am her only living connexion3 she's devoted to me When she comes to London it never occurs to her that she should stay anywhere but here — she thinks it would hurt my feelings — and she'll pay me visits of three or four weeks. We sit here and she knits and reads And sometimes she insists on taking me to dine at Claridge's 4 and she looks like a funny old charwoman5 and everyone I particularly don't want to be seen by is sitting at the next table"
Mrs Tower paused to take breath.
"I should have thought a woman of you tact would find a way to deal with a situation like that"
"Ah, but don't you see, I haven't a chance She's so immeasurably kind. She has a heart of gold She bores me to death, but I wouldn't for anything let her suspect it."
"And when does she arrive?"
"Tomorrow."
But the answer was hardly out of Mrs Tower's mouth when the bell rang. There were sounds in the hall of a slight commotion and in a minute or two the butler ushered in an elderly lady.
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"Mrs Fowler," he announced.
"Jane," cried Mrs Tower, springing to her feet. "I wasn't expecting you today."
"So your butler has just told me. I certainly said today in my letter."
Mrs Tower recovered her wits.6
"Well, it doesn't matter. I'm very glad to see you whenever you come. Fortunately I'm doing nothing this evening."
"You mustn't let me give you any trouble. If I can have a boiled egg for my dinner, that's all I shall want."
A faint grimace for a moment distorted Mrs Tower's handsome features. A boiled egg!
"Oh, I think we can do a little better than that."
I chuckled inwardly when I recollected that the two ladies were contemporaries. Mrs Fowler looked a good fifty-five. She was a rather big woman; she wore a black straw hat with a wide brim and from it a black lace veil hung over her shoulders, a cloak that oddly combined severity with fussi-ness, a long black dress, voluminous as though she wore several petticoats under it, and stout boots. She was evidently short-sighted, for she looked at you through large gold-rimmed spectacles.
"Won't you have a cup of tea?" asked Mrs Tower.
"If it wouldn't be too much trouble."
I felt it high time for me to leave the two ladies to themselves, so I took my leave.
Early next morning Mrs Tower rang me up and I heard at once from her voice that she was in high spirits.
"I've got the most wonderful news for you," she said. "Jane is going to be married."
"Nonsense."
"Her fiance is coming to dine here tonight to be introduced to me and I want you to come too."
"Oh, but I shall be in the way."
"No, you won't. Jane suggested herself that I should ask you. Do come."
When I arrived Mrs Tower, very splendid in a tea-gown a little too young for her, was alone.
"Jane is putting the finishing touches to her appearance. I'm longing for you to see her. She's all in a flutter. She says he adores her. His name is Gilbert and when she speaks of him her voice gets all funny and tremulous. It makes me want to laugh."
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"I wonder what he's like."
"Oh, I'm sure I know. Very big and massive, with a bald head and an immense gold chain across an immense tummy.7 A large, fat, clean-shaven, red face and a booming voice."
Mrs Fowler came in. She wore a very stiff black silk dress with a wide skirt and a train. At the neck it was cut into a timid V and the sleeves came down to the elbows. She wore a necklace of diamonds set in silver. She carried in her hands a long pair of black gloves and a fan of black ostrich feathers. She managed (as so few people do) to look exactly what she was. You could have never thought her anything in the world but the respectable relict of a North-country manufacturer of ample means.
"You've really got quite a pretty neck, Jane," said Mrs Tower with a kindly smile.
It was indeed astonishingly young when you compared it with her weather-beaten face. It was smooth and unlined and the skin was white. And I noticed then that her head was very well placed on her shoulders.
"Has Marion told you my news?" she said, turning to me with that really charming smile of hers as if we were already old friends.
"I must congratulate you," I said.
"Wait to do that till you've seen my young man."
"I think it's too sweet to hear you talk of your young man," smiled Mrs Tower.
Mrs Fowler's eyes certainly twinkled behind her preposterous spectacles.
"Don't expect anyone too old. You wouldn't like me to marry a decrepit old gentleman with one foot in the grave, would you?"
This was the only warning she gave us. Indeed there was no time for any further discussion, for the butler flung open the door and in a loud voice announced:
"Mr Gilbert Napier."
There entered a youth in a very well-cut dinner jacket. He was slight, not very tall, with fair hair in which there was a hint of a natural wave, clean-shaven, and blue-eyed. He was not particularly good-looking, but he had a pleasant, amiable face. He was certainly not more than twenty-four. My first thought was that this was the son of Jane Fowler's fiance (I had not known he was a widower) come to say that his father was prevented from dining by a sudden attack of gout. But his eyes fell immediately on Mrs Fowler, his face lit up, and he went towards her with both hands outstretched. Mrs Fowler gave him hers, a demure smile on her lips, and turned to her sister-in-law.
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"This is my young man, Marion," she said.
He held out his hand.
"I hope you'll like me, Mrs Tower," he said. "Jane tells me you're the only relation she has in the world."
Mrs Tower's face was wonderful to behold. I saw then to admiration how bravely good breeding and social usage could combat the instincts of the natural woman. For the astonishment and then the dismay that for an instant she could not conceal were quickly driven away, and her face assumed an expression of affable welcome. But she was evidently at a loss for words. It was not unnatural if Gilbert felt a certain embarrassment and I was too busy preventing myself from laughing to think of anything to say. Mrs Fowler alone kept perfectly calm.
"I know you'll like him, Marion. There's no one enjoys good food more than he does.'' She turned to the young man. "Marion's dinners are famous."
"I know," he beamed.
Mrs Tower made some quick rejoinder and we went downstairs. I shall not soon forget the exquisite comedy of that meal. Mrs Tower could not make up her mind whether the pair of them were playing a practical joke on her or whether Jane by wilfully concealing her fiance's age had hoped to make her look foolish. But then Jane never jested and she was incapable of doing a malicious thing. Mrs Tower was amazed, exasperated, and perplexed. But she had recovered her self-control, and for nothing would she have forgotten that she was a perfect hostess whose duty it was to make her party go.8 She talked vivaciously; but I wondered if Gilbert Napier saw how hard and vindictive was the expression of her eyes behind the mask of friendliness that she turned to him. She was measuring him. She was seeking to delve into the secret of his soul. I could see that she was in a passion. for under her rouge her cheeks glowed with an angry red.
"You've got a very high colour, Marion," said Jane, looking at her amiably through her great round spectacles.
"I dressed in a hurry. I dare say I put on too much rouge."
"Oh, is it rouge? I thought it was natural. Otherwise I shouldn't have mentioned it." She gave Gilbert a shy little smile. "You know, Marion and I were at school together. You would never think it to look at us now, would you? But of course I've lived a very quiet life."
I do not know what she meant by these remarks; it was almost incredible that she made them in complete simplicity; but anyhow they goaded Mrs Tower to such a fury that she flung her own vanity to the winds. 9 She smiled brightly.
"We shall neither of us see fifty again, Jane," she said.
If the observation was meant to discomfit the widow it failed.
"Gilbert says I mustn't acknowledge to more than forty-nine for his sake," she answered blandly.
Mrs Tower's hands trembled slightly, but she found a retort.
"There is of course a certain disparity of age between you," she smiled.
"Twenty-seven years," said Jane. "Do you think it's too much? Gilbert says I'm very young for my age. I told you I shouldn't like to marry a man with one foot in the grave."
I was really obliged to laugh and Gilbert laughed too. His laughter was frank and boyish. It looked as though he were amused at everything Jane said.
"I suppose you're very busy buying your trousseau," I said.
"No, I wanted to get my things from the dressmaker in Liverpool I've been to ever since I was first married. But Gilbert won't let me. He's very masterful, and of course he has wonderful taste.''
She looked at him with a little affectionate smile, demurely, as though she were a girl of seventeen.
Mrs Tower went quite pale under her make-up.
"We're going to Italy for our honeymoon. Gilbert has never had a chance of studying Renaissance architecture and of course it's important for an architect to see things for himself. And we shall stop in Paris on the way and get my clothes there."
"Do you expect to be away long?"
"Gilbert has arranged with his office to stay away for six months. It will be such a treat for him, won't it? You see, he's never had more than a fortnight's holiday before."
"Why not?" asked Mrs Tower in a tone that no effort of will could prevent from being icy.
"He's never been able to afford it, poor dear."
"Ah!" said Mrs Tower, and into the exclamation put volumes.10
Coffee was served and the ladies went upstairs; but in two minutes a note was brought in to me by the butler, it was from Mrs Tower and ran as follows:
"Come upstairs quickly and then go as soon as you can. Take him with you. Unless I have it out11 with Jane at once I shall have a fit."
I told a facile lie.
"Mrs Tower has a headache and wants to go to bed. I think if you don't mind we'd better clear out." "Certainly," he answered.
We went upstairs and five minutes later were on the doorstep. I called a taxi and offered the young man a lift.
"No, thanks," he answered. "I'll just walk to the corner and jump on a bus."
Mrs Tower sprang to the fray 12 as soon as she heard the front-door close behind us.
"Are you crazy, Jane?" she cried.
"Not more than most people who don't habitually live in a lunatic asylum, I trust," Jane answered blandly.
"May I ask you why you're going to marry this young man?" asked Mrs Tower with formidable politeness.
"Partly because he won't take no for an answer. He's asked me five times. I grew positively tired of refusing him."
"And why do you think he's so anxious to marry you?"
"I amuse him."
Mrs Tower gave an exclamation of annoyance.
"He's an unscrupulous rascal. I very nearly told him so to his face".
"You would have been wrong, and it wouldn't have been very polite."
"He's penniless and you're rich. You can't be such a besotted fool as not to see that he's marrying you for your money."
Jane remained perfectly composed. She observed her sister-in-law with detachment.
"I don't think he is, you know," she replied. "I think he's very fond of me."
"You're an old woman, Jane."
"I'm the same age as you are, Marion," she smiled "I've never let myself go. I'm very young for my age.
No one would think I was more than forty. But even I wouldn't dream of marrying a boy twenty years younger than myself." "Twenty-seven," corrected Jane.
"Do you mean to tell me that you can bring yourself to believe that it's possible for a young man to care for a woman old enough to be his mother?"
"I've lived very much in the country for many years. I dare say there's a great deal about human nature that I don't know. They tell me there's a man called Freud,13 an Austrian, I believe ..."
But Mrs Tower interrupted her without any politeness at all.
"Don't be ridiculous, Jane. It's so undignified. It's so ungraceful. I always thought you were a sensible woman. Really you're the last person I should ever have thought likely to fall in love with a boy."
"But I'm not in love with him. I've told him that. Of course I like him very much or I wouldn't think of marrying him. I thought it only fair to tell him quite plainly what my feelings were towards him."
Mrs Tower gasped.
" If you're not in love with him why do you want to marry him?"
"I've been a widow a very long time and I've led a very quiet life. I thought I'd like a change."
"If you want to marry just to be married why don't you marry a man of your own age?"
"No man of my own age has asked me five times. In fact no man of my own age has asked me at all."
Jane chuckled as she answered. It was altogether too much for Mrs Tower and she burst into tears.
"You're going to be so dreadfully unhappy," Mrs Tower sobbed.
"I don't think so, you know," Jane answered in those equable, mild tones of hers, as if there were a little smile behind the words. "We've talked it over very thoroughly. I always think I'm a very easy person to live with. I think I shall make Gilbert very happy and comfortable. He's never had anyone to look after him properly. We're only marrying after mature consideration. And we've decided that if either of us wants his liberty the other will place no obstacles in the way of his getting it."
Mrs Tower had by now recovered herself sufficiently to make a cutting remark.
"How much has he persuaded you to settle on him?"
"I wanted to settle a thousand a year on him, but he wouldn't hear of it. He was quite upset when I made the suggestion. He says he can earn quite enough for his own needs."
"He's more cunning than I thought," said Mrs Tower acidly.
Mrs Tower gathered herself together with dignity.
"I'm so upset that I really must go to bed," she said. "We'll resume the conversation tomorrow morning."
"I'm afraid that won't be very convenient, dear. Gilbert and I are going to get the licence14 tomorrow morning."
The marriage took place at a registrar's office.15 Mrs Tower and I were the witnesses. Gilbert in a smart blue suit looked absurdly young and he was obviously nervous. It is a trying moment for any man. But Jane kept her admirable composure. She might have been in the habit of marrying as frequently as a woman of fashion. Only a slight colour on her cheeks suggested that beneath her calm was some faint excitement. We saw them off, and I drove Mrs Tower back to her house.
"How long do you give it?" she said. "Six months?"
"Let's hope for the best," I smiled.
"Don't be so absurd. There can be no 'best'. You don't think he's marrying her for anything but her money, do you? Of course it can't last. My only hope is that she won't have to go through as much suffering as she deserves.''
I laughed. The charitable words were spoken in such a tone as to leave me in small doubt of Mrs Tower's meaning.
"Well, if it doesn't last you'll have the consolation of saying: 'I told you so'," I said.
"I promise you I'll never do that."
"Then you'll have the satisfaction of congratulating yourself on your self-control in not saying: 'I told you so'!"
"She's old and dowdy and dull."
"Are you sure she's dull?" I said. "It's true she doesn't say very much, but when she says anything it's very much to the point."
"I've never heard her make a joke in my life."
I was once more in the Far East when Gilbert and Jane returned from their honeymoon and this time I remained away for nearly two years. Mrs Tower was a bad correspondent and though I sent her an occasional picture-postcard I received no news from her. But I met her within a week of my return to London; I was dining out16 and found that I was seated next to her. When Mrs Tower and I had exchanged the conventional remarks that two people make when they have not seen one another for a couple of years I asked about Jane.
"She's very well," said Mrs Tower with a certain dryness.
"How has the marriage turned out?" Mrs Tower paused a little and took a salted almond from the dish in front of her.
"It appears to be quite a success." "You were wrong then?"
"I said it wouldn't last and I still say it won't last. It's contrary to human nature." "Is she happy?" "They're both happy."
"I suppose you don't see very much of them." "At first I saw quite a lot of them. But now ..."Mrs Tower pursed her lips a little. "Jane is becoming very grand." "What do you mean?" I laughed. "I think I should tell you that she's here tonight." "Here?"
I was startled. I looked round the table again. Our hostess was a delightful and an entertaining woman, but I could not imagine that she would be likely to invite to a dinner such as this the elderly and dowdy wife of an obscure architect. Mrs Tower saw my perplexity and was shrewd enough to see what was in my mind. She smiled thinly.
"Look on the left of our host."
I looked. Oddly enough the woman who sat there had by her fantastic appearance attracted my attention the moment I was ushered into the crowded drawing-room. I thought I noticed a gleam of recognition in her eye, but to the best of my belief I had never seen her before. She was not a young woman, for her hair was iron-grey; it was cut very short and clustered thickly round her well-shapped head in tight curls. She made no attempt at youth, for she was conspicuous in that gathering by using neither lipstick, rouge, nor powder. Her face, not a particularly handsome one, was red and weather-beaten; but because it owed nothing to artifice had a naturalness that was very pleasing. It contrasted oddly with the whiteness of her shoulders. They were really magnificent. A woman of thirty might have been proud of them. But her dress was extraordinary. I had not often seen anything more audacious. It was cut very low, with short skirts, which were then the fashion, in black and yellow; it had almost the effect of fancy-dress and yet so became her that though on anyone else it would have been outrageous, on her it had the inevitable simplicity of nature. And to complete the impression of an eccentricity in which there was no pose and of an extravagance in which there was no ostentation she wore, attached by a broad black ribbon, a single eyeglass.
"You're not going to tell me that is your sister-in-law," 1 gasped.
"That is Jane Napier," said Mrs Tower icily.
"Let me have a long drink of champagne and then for heaven's sake tell me all about it," I said.
Well, this is how I gathered it had all happened. At the beginning of their honeymoon Gilbert took Jane to various dressmakers in Paris and he made no objection to her choosing a number of "gowns" after her own heart; but he persuaded her to have a "frock" or two made according to his own design. It appeared that he had a knack for that kind of work. He engaged a smart French maid.
Gilbert and the French maid taught her how to wear her clothes, and, unexpectedly enough, she was very quick at learning.
So they went down to Italy and spent happy months studying Renaissance and Baroque architecture. Jane not only grew accustomed to her changed appearance, but found she liked it. Pygmalion17 had finished his fantastic masterpiece: Galatea had come to life.
"Yes," I said, "but that isn't enough to explain why Jane is here tonight amid this crowd of duchesses, Cabinet Ministers, and suchlike; nor why she is sitting on one side of her host with an Admiral of the Fleet on the other."
"Jane is a humorist," said Mrs Tower. "Didn't you see them all laughing at what she said?"
There was no doubt now of the bitterness in Mrs Tower's heart.
"When Jane wrote and told me they were back from their honeymoon I thought I must ask them both to dinner. I didn't much like the idea, but I felt it had to be done. I knew the party would be deadly and I wasn't going to sacrifice any of the people who really mattered. On the other hand I didn't want Jane to think I hadn't any nice friends. I'd been too busy to see Jane until the evening of the party. She kept us all waiting a little — that was Gilbert's cleverness — and at last she sailed in. You could have knocked me down with a feather.18 She made the rest of the women look dowdy and provincial. She made me feel like a painted old trollop."
Mrs Tower drank a little champagne.
"I wish I could describe the frock to you. .It would have been quite impossible on anyone else; on her it was perfect. And the eyeglass! I'd known her for thirty-five years and I'd never seen her without spectacles."
"But you knew she had a good figure."
"How should I? I'd never seen her except in the clothes you first saw her in. Did you think she had a good figure? She seemed not to be unconscious of the sensation she made but to take it as a matter of course. I thought of my dinner and heaved a sigh of relief. Even if she was a little heavy in hand,19 with that appearance it didn't so very much matter. She was sitting at the other end of the table and I heard a good deal of laughter. I was glad to think that the other people were playing up well;20 but after dinner I was a good deal taken aback when no less than three men came up to me and told me that my sister-in-law was priceless, and did I think she would allow them to call on her? I didn't quite know whether I was standing on my head or my heels. Twenty-four hours later our hostess of tonight rang me up and said she had heard my sister-in-law was in London and she was priceless and would I ask her to luncheon to meet her? She has an infallible instinct, that woman: in a month everyone was talking about Jane. I am here tonight, not because I've known our hostess for twenty years and have asked her to dinner a hundred times, but because I'm Jane's sister-in-law."
"I'm dying to renew my acquaintance with her."
"Go and talk to her after dinner. She'll ask you to her Tuesdays."
"Her Tuesdays?"
"She's at home21 every Tuesday evening. You'll meet there everyone you have heard of. They're the best parties in London. She's done in one year what I've failed to do in twenty."
"But what you tell me is really miraculous. How has it been done?"
Mrs Tower shrugged her handsome but adipose shoulders.
"I shall be glad if you'll tell me," she replied.
After dinner I tried to make my way to the sofa on which Jane was sitting, but I was intercepted and it was not till a little later that my hostess came up to me and said:
"I must introduce you to the star of my party. Do you know Jane Napier? She's priceless. She's much more amusing than your comedies."
I was taken up to the sofa. The admiral who had been sitting beside her at dinner was with her still. He showed no sign of moving and Jane, shaking hands with me, introduced me to him.
"Do you know Sir Reginald Frobisher?"
We began to chat. It was the same Jane as I had known before, perfectly simple, homely and unaffected, but her fantastic appearance certainly gave a peculiar savour to what she said. Suddenly I found myself shaking with laughter. She had made a remark, sensible and to the point, but not in the least witty, which her manner of saying and the bland look she gave me through her eyeglass made perfectly irresistible. I felt light-hearted and buoyant. When I left she said to me:
"If you've got nothing better to do, come and see us on Tuesday evening. Gilbert will be so glad to see you."
"When he's been a month in London he'll know that he can have nothing better to do," said the admiral.
So, on Tuesday but rather late, I went to Jane's. I confess I was a little surprised at the company. It was a quite a remarkable collection of writers, painters and politicians, actors, great ladies and great beauties: Mrs Tower was right, it was a grand party. No particular entertainment was provided. The refreshments were adequate without being luxurious. Jane in her quiet way seemed to be enjoying herself; I could not see that she took a great deal of trouble with her guests, but they seemed to like being there and the gay, pleasant party did not break up till two in the morning. After that I saw much of her. I am an amateur of humour and I sought to discover in what lay her peculiar gift. It was impossible to repeat anything she said, for the fun, like certain wines, would not travel. She had no gift for epigram. She never made a brilliant repartee. There was no malice in her remarks nor sting in her rejoinders. There are those who think that impropriety, rather than brevity, is the soul of wit;22 but she never said a thing that could have brought a blush to a Victorian cheek.23 I think her humour was unconscious and I am sure it was unpremeditated. It depended on the way she spoke and on the way she looked. Gilbert was delighted with her success. As I came to know him better I grew to like him. It was quite evident that he was neither a rascal nor a fortune-hunter. He was not only immensely proud of Jane but genuinely devoted to her
"Well, what do you think of Jane now?" he said to me once, with boyish triumph.
"I don't know which of you is more wonderful," 1 said. "You or she."
"Oh, I'm nothing."
"Nonsense. You don't think I'm such a fool as not to see that it's you, and only you, who've made Jane what she is."
"My only merit is that I saw what was there when it wasn't obvious to the naked eye," he answered.
"I can understand you seeing that she had in her the possibility of that remarkable appearance, but how in the world have you made her into a humorist?"
"But I always thought the things she said a perfect scream.24 She was always a humorist."
"You're the only person who ever thought so."
Mrs Tower, not without magnanimity, acknowledged that she had been mistaken in Gilbert. She grew quite attached to him. But notwithstanding appearances she never faltered in her opinion that the marriage could not last. I was obliged to laugh at her.
"Why, I've never seen such a devoted couple," I said.
"Gilbert is twenty-seven now. It's just the time for a pretty girl to come along. Did you notice the other evening at Jane's that pretty little niece of Sir Reginald's? I thought Jane was looking at them both with a good deal of attention, and I wondered to myself."
"I don't believe Jane fears the rivalry of any girl under the sun."
"Wait and see," said Mrs Tower.
"You gave it six months."
"Well, now I give it three years."
When anyone is very positive in an opinion it is only human nature to wish him proved wrong. Mrs Tower was really too cocksure. But such a satisfaction was not mine, for the end that she had always and confidently predicted to the ill-assorted match did in point of fact come. Still, the fates seldom give us what we want in the way we want it, and though Mrs Tower could flatter herself that she had been right, I think after all she would sooner have been wrong. For things did not happen at all in the way she expected.
One day I received an urgent message from her and fortunately went to see her at once. When I was shown into the room Mrs Tower rose from her chair and came towards me with the stealthy swiftness of a leopard stalking his prey. I saw that she was excited.
"Jane and Gilbert have separated," she said.
"Not really?25 Well, you were right after all."
Mrs Tower looked at me with an expression I could not understand.
"Poor Jane," I muttered.
"Poor Jane!" she repeated, but in tones of such derision that I was dumbfounded.
She found some difficulty in telling me exactly what had occurred.
Gilbert had left her a moment before she leaped to the telephone to summon me. When he entered the room, pale and distraught, she saw at once that something terrible had happened. She knew what he was going to say before he said it.
"Marion, Jane has left me."
She gave him a little smile and took his hand.
"I knew you'd behave like a gentleman. It would have been dreadful for her for people to think that you had left her."
"I've come to you because I knew I could count on your sympathy."
"Oh, I don't blame you, Gilbert," said Mrs Tower, very kindly. "It was bound to happen." He sighed.
"I suppose so. I couldn't hope to keep her always. She was too wonderful and I'm a perfectly commonplace fellow."
Mrs Tower patted his hand He was really behaving beautifully.
"And what's going to happen now?"
"Well, she's going to divorce me."
"Jane always said she'd put no obstacle in your way if ever you wanted to marry a girl."
"You don't think it's likely I should ever be willing to marry anyone else after being Jane's husband," he answered
Mrs Tower was puzzled.
"Of course you mean that you've left Jane."
"I? That's the last thing I should ever do."
"Then why is she divorcing you?"
"She's going to marry Sir Reginald Frobisher as soon as the decree26 is made absolute."
Mrs Tower positively screamed. Then she felt so faint that she had to get her smelling salts.
"After all you've done for her?"
"I've done nothing for her."
"Do you mean to say you're going to allow yourself to be made use of like that?"
"We arranged before we married that if either of us wanted his liberty the other should put no hindrance in the way."
"But that was done on your account. Because you were twenty-seven years younger than she was."
"Well, it's come in very useful for her," he answered bitterly.
Mrs Tower expostulated, argued, and reasoned; but Gilbert insisted that no rules applied to Jane, and he must do exactly what she wanted. He left Mrs Tower prostrate. She was still in a state of extreme agitation when the door was opened and the butler showed in — Jane herself. She was dressed in black and white as no doubt befitted her slightly ambiguous position, but in a dress so original and fantastic, in a hat so striking, that I positively gasped at the sight of her. But she was as ever bland and collected. She came forward to kiss Mrs Tower, but Mrs Tower withdrew herself with icy dignity.
"Gilbert has been here," she said.
"Yes, I know," smiled Jane. "I told him to come and see you. I'm going to Paris tonight and I want you to be very kind to him while I'm away. I'm afraid just at first he'll be rather lonely and I shall feel more comfortable if I can count on your keeping an eye on him."
Mrs Tower clasped her hands.
"Gilbert has just told me something that I can hardly bring myself to believe. He tells me that you're going to divorce him to marry Reginald Frobisher."
"Don't you remember, before I married Gilbert you advised me to marry a man of my own age? The admiral is fifty-three."
"But, Jane, you owe everything to Gilbert," said Mrs Tower indignantly. "You wouldn't exist without him. Without him to design you clothes, you'll be nothing."
"Oh, he's promised to go on designing my clothes," Jane answered blandly.
"No woman could want a better husband. He's always been kindness itself to you."
"Oh, I know he's been sweet."
"How can you be so heartless?"
"But I was never in love with Gilbert," said Jane. "I always told him that. I'm beginning to feel the need of the companionship of a man of my own age. I think I've probably been married to Gilbert long enough. The young have no conversation." She paused a little and gave us both a charming smile. "Of course I shan't lose sight of Gilbert. I've arranged that with Reginald. The admiral has a niece that would just suit him. As soon as we're married we'll ask them to stay with us at Malta — you know that the admiral is to have the Mediterranean Command — and I shouldn't be at all surprised if they fell in love with one another." Mrs Tower gave a little sniff.
"And you have arranged with the admiral that if you want your liberty neither should put any hindrance in the way of the other?"
"I suggested it," Jane answered with composure. "But the admiral says he knows a good thing when he sees it and he won't want to marry anyone else, and if anyone wants to marry me — he has eight twelve-inch guns on his flagship and he'll discuss the matter at short range." She gave us a look through her eyeglass which even the fear of Mrs Tower's wrath could not prevent me from laughing at. "I think the admiral's a very passionate man."
Mrs Tower gave me an angry frown.
"I never thought you funny, Jane," she said. "I never understood why people laughed at the things you said."
"I never thought I was funny myself, Marion," smiled Jane, showing her bright, regular teeth. "I am glad to leave London before too many people come round to your opinion."
"I wish you'd tell me the secret of your astonishing success," I said.
She turned to me with that bland, homely look I knew so well.
"You know, when I married Gilbert and settled in London and people began to laugh at what I said no one was more surprised than I was. I'd said the same things for thirty years and no one ever saw anything to laugh at. I thought it must be my clothes or my bobbed hair or my eyeglass. Then I discovered it was because I spoke the truth. It was so unusual that people thought it humorous. One of these days someone else will discover the secret and when people habitually tell the truth of course there'll be nothing funny in it."
"And why am I the only person not to think it funny?" asked Mrs Tower.
Jane hesitated a little as though she were honestly searching for a satisfactory explanation.
"Perhaps you don't know the truth when you see it, Marion, dear," she answered in her mild good-natured way.
It certainly gave her the last word. I felt that Jane would always have the last word. She was priceless.
NOTES
1. husks: the dry outer covering of seeds, esp. of grain;
a prodigal returned from his husks: a wanderer who had
come home from his worthless, useless travels.
The allusion here is to the biblical character of the Prodigal Son who returns home to repent the years he had spent in waste and sin; his homecoming was celebrated by the killing of the fatted calf.
The prodigal's homecoming is described in the New Testament (Luke, XV, 14—16) in the following lines: "And when he had spent all, there arose a mighty famine in that country; and he began to be in want. ... And he would fain have been filled with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him." «... и он рад был наполнить чрево свое рожками, которые ели свиньи".
2. to be bidden: to be invited
3. connexion: a relative
4.Claridge's: a fashionable, extremely expensive hotel in London
5. charwoman: a woman who works by the day at rough housework, scrubbing, cleaning, etc.
6. recovered her wits: regained control of hersell
7. tummy (collog.): the stomach
8.to make her party go: to make the party a success
9.she flung her own vanity to the winds: she discarded all consideration for her own vanity, sacrificing it completely
10. and into the exclamation put volumes: the exclamation was full of significance, it was meant to express her feelings to the full
11. have it out: to discuss and come to an understanding on a matter
12.sprang to the fray: started her attack
13.Freud, Sigmund, (1856—1939), Professor of neurology at Vienna University, founder of psychoanalysis, a method of investigation of mental processes and the motives of conduct, based on a supposed conflict between the conscious will and subconscious or unconscious impressions, desires, etc. which results in various "repressions" and "complexes"
14.licence: a marriage licence, a formal document granting permission to marry
15.The marriage took place at a registrar's office: they were married before a registrar (an official who keeps the records of births, marriages, deaths), without a religious ceremony
16.dine out: to eat dinner away from home
17.Pygmalion: in Greek mythology, a king of Cyprus, and a sculptor, who was said to have fallen in love with the ivory statue of a maiden he himself had made, and to have prayed to Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of love and beauty, to breathe life into it. The statue was brought to life and Pygmalion married the maiden, whom he called Galatea.
18.You could have knocked me down with a feather: a phrase used to show that a person is speechless with surprise
19.a little heavy in hand: a poor conversationalist, a bore
20.were playing up well: were tackling the job quite successfully
21.be at home: to give receptions at one's house
22.impropriety, rather than brevity is the soul of wit: something improper, indecent, ambiguous is sooner appreciated than a truly witty statement.
"Brevity is the soul of wit": краткость — душа таланта, a phrase from Shakespeare's tragedy "Hamlet, Prince of Denmark".
23.could have brought a blush to a Victorian cheek: could have shocked a person brought up according to the principles of the England in the reign of Queen Victoria (1837—1901), showing the middle-class respectability, prudery, bigotry, etc.
24.a perfect scream (colloq.): a person or thing that is very funny or ridiculous
25.Not really? (an expression of interest, surprise, doubt, etc.) «Не может быть!»
26.decree, decree nisi (Lat.): order for a divorce, becoming absolute after a fixed period (usu. six weeks)
EXERCISES
1. Answer the following guestions.
1. Why did the author remember so well the occasion when he first met Jane Fowler? 2. What were the circumstances of their first meeting? 3. Where did it take place? 4. What sort of person was Mrs Tower? 5. What was Mrs Tower's opinion of Jane's looks, clothes and mental abilities? 6. Why did she speak of Jane Fowler as her "cross"? 7. What were the relations between the two women? 8. What was the author's impression of Jane? 9. How did Mrs Tower take the news of Jane's coming marriage? 10. Why did the very idea seem" preposterous to her? 11. What were Jane's reasons for getting married? 12. What arguments did Mrs Tower use trying to dissuade Jane from taking this step? 13. What happened when Gilbert Napier, the prospective husband, appeared on the scene? 14. Why was Mrs Tower shocked beyond words? 15. What made Mrs Tower believe that the marriage would last six months at best? 16. When did the author see Jane next? 17. What was Jane like now? 18. Why did people seek her company? 19. Why did Jane decide to leave Gilbert and marry Sir Reginald Frobisher? 20. Why did Mrs Tower disapprove of her decision? 21. What made Mrs Tower feel bitter towards Jane? 22. How did Jane herself explain her social success? 23. Why would Jane forever remain a puzzle to people like Mrs Tower?
2. Paraphrase or explain.
1. ... she treated me as her contemporary. 2. Mrs Tower brought me up to date in the scandal of the day. 3. She's worthy, she's dowdy, she's provincial. 4. ... in a tea-gown a little too young for her ... 5. You could have never thought her anything in the world but the respectable relict of a North-country manufacturer of ample means. 6. I saw then to admiration how bravely good breeding and social usage could combat the instincts of the natural woman. 7. She was measuring him. 8. We're only marrying after mature consideration. 9. And to complete the impression of an eccentricity in which there was no pose and of an extravagance in which there was no ostentation she wore ... a single eyeglass. 10. It was impossible to repeat anything she said, for the fun, like certain wines, would not travel. 11. There was no malice in her remarks nor sting in her rejoinders. 12. But notwithstanding appearances she never faltered in her opinion that the marriage could not last.
3. Say what is meant by
an overwhelming sense of family affection; a woman of tact; good breeding; social usage; a practical joke; a perfect hostess; to be in a passion; disparity of age; human nature; a cutting remark; a trying moment; a woman of fashion; conventional remarks; an obscure architect; an artifice; to have a knack for smth.; to take smth. as a matter of course; an infallible instinct; a peculiar savour; a fortune-hunter
4. Express the following more simply.
1. She never sought to conceal the fact; 2. there were few persons who did not look upon it as a treat to be bidden to one of them; 3. Mrs Tower's face was wonderful to behold.
4. she was conspicuous in that gathering; 5. She was dressed in black and white as no doubt befitted her slightly ambiguous position ...
5. Find in the text the English for
обращаться с кем-либо как с ровесником; не делать секрета из; преуменьшать свой возраст на пять лет; красить волосы; седеть; принять необходимые меры; общие знакомые; назначить день; горестная улыбка; облегающее платье с узкими рукавами; золотой медальон; гладко зачесанные назад волосы; широкий лоб; тупой нос; и в голову не приходить; нанести обиду; остановиться, чтобы перевести дыхание; найти выход из положения; наводить смертельную тоску на кого-либо; вскочить на ноги; собраться с мыслями; легкая гримаса; выглядеть на добрых пятьдесят пять; распрощаться; быть в великолепном расположении духа; делать последние приготовления; ожерелье из алмазов, оправленных в серебро; веер из страусовых перьев; лукаво блеснуть (о глазах); смокинг; приступ подагры; протянуть руку (для пожатия); хорошее воспитание; светские манеры; сохранять абсолютное спокойствие; злая шутка; поставить в глупое положение; румяна; яркий румянец; вести спокойную жизнь; по простоте душевной; тщеславие; приводить в замешательство; несоответствие в возрасте; увидеть собственными глазами; предложить подвезти; бессовестный подлец; расплакаться; обговорить все подробно; заботиться о ком-либо; по зрелому размышлению; не чинить препятствий; язвительное замечание; возобновить разговор; жениться из-за денег; не получать никаких известий; редко встречаться с кем-либо; поджать губы слегка; быть достаточно проницательной; как ни странно; привлечь чье-либо внимание; не возражать против чего-либо; выбрать на свой вкус; пригласить на обед; безошибочный нюх; возобновить знакомство; пожать плечами; два часа ночи; единственная заслуга; невооруженным глазом; ни разу не поколебаться в своем мнении; онеметь; взять за руку; рассчитывать на чье-либо сочувствие; почувствовать слабость; договориться; несколько двойственное положение; быть всем обязанным кому-либо; не терять из виду; поделиться секретом необычного успеха; поселиться в Лондоне; говорить правду; подходящее объяснение; последнее слово осталось за ней
6. Study the italicized phrases. Recall how they were used in
the text. Make sentences with each.
1. As the only child in the family the boy had always been petted, flattered and in general made much of. 2. The report made much of the fact that too little attention had been given to details. 3. I wouldn't hurt her feelings for anything. 4. He never seems to be at a loss for an appropriate word. 5. The letter didn't make things much clearer. She was at a loss what to think. 6. I don't see much of them these days. 7.You mustn't let yourself go like that! 8. There's no stopping him when helets himself go at a party. 9. She couldn't bring herself to break the sad news. 10. The statement was brief, terse and to the point. 11.To the best of my recollection I've never mentioned the circumstance to anyone. 12. I was taken aback by the news. 13. The boy can be a terrible nuisance. You'll have to keep an eye on him. 14. The car looks as good as new. He must be taking a lot of trouble with it. 15. He mix-ed with the crowd and we lost sight of him. 16. She never lost sight of such a possibility. 17. Finally they all came round to my point of view. 18. He was coming round to think- ing that there might be other ways and means to settle the matter.
7. Express the following using phrases from Exercise 6.
1. There was nothing to make him give up his preposterous ideas. 2. I was surprised beyond words to see the bitter opponents of half an hour ago chatting mildly over a cup of tea. 3. There are difficulties you must not forget about. 4. There was no price high enough to make him part with his dog. 5. The whole thing seemed so incredible that for a moment I didn't quite know what to say. 6. It was not before she found herself alone that she broke down giving way to tears. 7. They must meet pretty often, they're next-door neighbours. 8. He never beats about the bush. Whatever he has to say is always strictly on the subject. 9. While doing the housework she kept looking at the clock. 10. The boy couldn't make himself repeat what he had heard. 11. Some day you may understand that it had all been done with the best of intentions. 12. It couldn't be true. She just couldn't make herself believe it. 13. His roses are the best in the neighbourhood. He does give them a lot of his time and attention. 14. He laid emphasis on the difficulties he had encountered in promoting the plan. 15. I was puzzled by his behaviour. I didn't know what to think.
8. Paraphrase the following so as to use the subjunctive mood in object clauses after the verb wish Make other necessary changes.
1. It's a pity that he didn't tell me what he felt about the scheme at once. 2. Too bad, you didn't take his hint. 3. I felt terribly sorry not to have been with them in their hour of need. 4. He regretted not to have given them the necessary warning. 5. It's a pity that he doesn't have a sense of humour. 6. Unfortunately I was late and missed all the fun. 7. I'm leaving tonight and I'm very sorry that I shan't be coming to your birthday party. 8. She was sorry to have given way to her temper. 9. We were disappointed not to hear him speak his mind at the meeting. 10. You should have let me know your decision at once.
9. In the following groups of sentences, compare the meaning of the italicized words Translate them into Russian.
1. a) As usual she had little to say. b) It won't do either of you any good even if you have it out. 2. a) We all heard him well enough. b) She insisted that I should hear her out.3.a) They work shorter hours Wednesdays and Saturdays. b) I can't say anything definite yet. I still have to work it out.4.a) Boys will fight. b) They don't seem to be arguing any more.They must have fought it out between themselves. 5.a) He found the address. b) She found him out.
10. Translate the following into Russian.
1. "You'd known about it all along and kept quiet," she gasped. 2. "I don't care what happens." He shrugged.3."There doesn't seem to be much hope," she smiled wanly.4."No, such things won't go down with me," she laughed.5. "It sounds too good to be true," the girl sighed. 6. "Yours to command," the man bowed.
11. Study the italicized words, discriminate between the shades of
difference in their usage or in their meaning. Translate the sentences into Russian.
A. 1. He chuckled as he told us about the joke he had played on his friends. 2. It was all so funny that they laughed until they were quite helpless. 3. I was surprised to see the two elderly ladies giggling like silly school-girls. 4. She tittered nervously. 5. He had a feeling that the whole world knew about his failure. He could almost hear the street boys snickering at him behind his back. 6. The red-faced drunk tripped the boy and guffawed.
B. 1. Several of the passengers were seriously injured in the accident. 2. The flood is certain to damage the crops. 3. Nothing hurts more than a bad tooth. 4. A little extra work won't hurt you. 5. I don't really see why your feelings should have been hurt. 6. Is she the kind that wouldn't harm a fly? 7. The dress was spoiled beyond repair. 8. He'll be spoiling his chances if he carries on like this.
C. 1. The mistake you made was quite an ordinary sort of mistake. Such mistakes are common enough among beginners. 2. I had never known him well, but he had always seemed to me an ordinary sort of person. 3. The general idea has been expressed clearly enough, it's the details that bother me. 4.Hardly any criticism was voiced, just a few general remarks.
12. Supply the missing word.
a)bare, naked
1. You can't handle a live wire with your ... hands! 2. In the distance I could see the beach with ... bodies lying here and there. 3. It was late autumn and the trees stood quite ... .4. She took a peep into the cupboard. It was quite ... . 5. The ... truth is better than pretence. 6. The boy ran into the house leaving muddy footprints all over the place with his ... feet. 7. There are things that can't be seen with the ... eye.
b) sense, feeling, sensation
1. He could sense the general ... of discontent among his listeners. He wondered about the reason. 2. A ... of injury persisted, though if asked to explain he would have hardly been able to put it into words. 3. She tried to rise, but she couldn't. There was a funny ... in her legs as if they weren't quite her own. 4. He had a ... about the place, it was as if he belonged there. 5. As she watched her son take his seat among the other boys in the bus she was overwhelmed by a ... of loss, it was as if she would never be seeing him again. 6. To sit in the warmth of the camp fire was a very pleasant ... .
13. Study the following word combinations. Translate them into
Russian. Make sentences with each.
fix: a loose board; a lid on a box; a shelf to a wall; the blame on a person; a date; a price;
one's eyes on smth.; one's mind, thoughts, hopes on smb., smth.
a fact in one's mind;
resume: work; talks, negotiations; conversation;
one's seat;
trying: person; journey, trip; day;
work; time; situation; experience;
peculiar: ideas; temperament; privilege; people;
attention; talent; gift; attraction;
behaviour; way of thinking; sort of man
14. Translate Into English using mean.
1. Что означает это слово? 2. У меня и в мыслях не было обидеть его. 3. Я нисколько не сомневаюсь в том, что она это сделала из самых добрых побуждений. 4. Когда он говорил о цветах, он имел в виду розы. 5. Что это значит? Как вы могли позвонить им так поздно? 6. Для него эта дружба значила очень много. 7. Я и не собирался приходить на вечер, все это получилось случайно. 8. Какой чудесный альбом! Неужели он для меня? 9. Он не шутил. Он подразумевал именно то, что сказал. 10. Ее мнение для меня очень существенно. 11. Как ни странно, но его слово здесь действительно ничего не значит.
15. Translate the following into English using for A occasion, case, chance, incident, accident and for В offer or suggest according to the sense.
A. 1. Это был случай, который нельзя было упускать. 2. Это был мелкий случай, о котором не стоило даже упоминать. 3. Больному требуется немедленная операция. Это очень тяжелый случай. 4. Разрешите поздравить вас по случаю вашего юбилея. 5. Возможно, вам и удастся купить билеты на сегодняшний спектакль, хотя я в этом очень сомневаюсь. Но, как говорят, это дело случая. 6. Я бы вам очень советовал пойти на встречу. Это прекрасный случай познакомиться с интересными людьми. 7. Никто из нас не застрахован от несчастного случая. 8. Дети были в восторге от фильма «Случай на границе». 9. То, о чем вы рассказываете, вполне обычный случай. 10. В некоторых случаях мне пришлось пойти на уступки. 11. Я не помню ни одного случая, чтобы ваш друг признал свою неправоту. 12. Почему же он не согласился принять участие в конференции? Почему он не захотел воспользоваться таким прекрасным случаем высказать свою точку зрения на существующие теории по этому вопросу?
B. 1.Насколько я знаю, после окончания института ему предложили очень интересную работу. 2. Председатель комиссии предложил сначала внимательно изучить все документы, а затем уже начать обсуждение. 3. На собрании было предложено шире использовать новые методы работы
на практике. 4. Врач предложил ему прийти через несколько дней для вторичного осмотра. 5. Я вам могу предложить чашку кофе? 6. Молодой ученый предложил очень интересное третье решение задачи. 7. Он предложил пойти в кино.
16. Render the following in English. Use the words and phrases given below.
ДОБРОСОВЕСТНЫЙ СТОРОЖ
Английский город Бирмингем может гордиться самым добросовестным сторожем своего городского парка. Кеннет Аллен каждый вечер звонком извещает посетителей о закрытии сада, после чего старательно запирает ворота Лайтвуд-парка - их четыре. При этом ему нисколько не мешает тот факт, что у парка нет никакой ограды.
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sense of duty; Birmingham; conscientious; a watchman; Kenneth Allen; to notify; Lightwood Park
БЛАГОЖЕЛАТЕЛЬ
Своеобразную заботу о женихах с невестами проявляет директор зала венчания в Уэльсе (Великобритания). Ежедневно на дверях его конторы вывешивается объявление: «Ушел завтракать. Вернусь в 14 часов. У вас есть еще время подумать».
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a well-wisher; a peculiar concern; a registrar; a registrar's office; Wales in Great Britain; to put up a notice
ВНИМАНИЕ
Лондонская газета «Таймс» поместила на днях такое объявление: «Мистер Гью Беллами позволяет себе обратить внимание своих несколько удивленных друзей на то, что, если он не узнает их на улице и не поклонится, то произойдет это отнюдь не из-за его высокомерия, самомнения или нетрезвого состояния, а лишь вследствие его близорукости».
_______________________________
caution!; the Times; to carry a notice; Mr Hugh Bellamy; to wish to draw smb.'s attention to smth.; to fail to recognize; to greet; arrogance; conceit; drunken state; faulty eyesight
СЕКРЕТ ОСТРОУМИЯ
Когда однажды известного американского комика Гра-учо Маркса спросили, какие из его острот пользуются наибольшим успехом у публики, он дал такой ответ: «Иногда я, вместо того чтобы что-то придумывать, начинаю пересказывать некоторые правительственные постановления и Другие официальные документы, цитировать выступления должностных лиц. Я излагаю факты, но публика принимает их за самые удачные из моих острот и в таких случаях особенно щедро награждает меня аплодисментами».
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ready wit; a comedian; Groucho Marx; a witticism; a joke; to be a success with the public; to invent; to relate the contents of; to quote; to get a big hand
17. Topics for oral and written composition.
1. Character-sketches of a) Mrs Tower; b) Jane Fowler.
2. The English conception of respectability.
3. The secret of Jane's attraction for people.
ERSKINE CALDWELL*
*Caldwell, Erskine (1903-1987), an American author, born in White Oak, Georgia. The author of American Earth (1931) Tobacco Road (1932) God`s Little Acre (1933) and others.
TO THE CHAPARRAL1
It was the last day in the month of May again and, it being aspringtime habit for many years, Tarl Pricehouse got ready to leavehome the following morning, the first day of June. Tarl had gatheredan assortment of fish-hooks, lines and leaders and he carefullyarranged the fishing gear in a red tin cracked box and stowed it in thecloth bean sack in which he had already packed several shirts, pairsof socks, an extra pair of shoes for muddy weather, and a dozen cansof pipe tobacco.
This year Tarl had decided to go straight to Friday River, foronce not bothering to think of an excuse to leave home, and to spendtwo or three weeks, or even longer if he felt like it, fishing. When hegot there, he planned to sleep in the dwarf-oak lean-to2 he had builton the river-bank many years before, and to fish and fish to hisheart's content. Friday River was a placid, spring-watered, bigmouth-bass stream about nine miles due west from town in theblack-bark chaparral. The river meandered for several hundred milesover the thorny-bush prairie and dwarf-oak plains before reachingthe Gulf.3
Tarl was resting on the kitchen steps when Bessie, his wife, came home from work late that afternoon and found him hugging the bean sack between his knees. Bessie, who was well into her forties, and a few years younger than Tarl, worked the year around for the steam laundry company in Maverick. She had not remembered that the following day would be the first of June, until she was almost home, and then she had hurried so fast that she was completely out of breath when she got there. Bessie sat down in a porch chair, her fleshy body gratefully at ease, and panted until her breath came back.
"Mighty nice, fine weather, for the time of the year," Tarl remarked pleasantly, squinting upward at the sky and hoping to keep his wife's attention diverted from the bulging bean sack.
Bessie did not even nod in reply, and he was aware that she was observing him. For the past several weeks Bessie had planned and schemed and contrived to prevent Tarl from walking off from home this year as he had always managed to do in the past. She had made up her mind to put an end, for all time, to his habit, as though he were as free as a bird in the breeze, of going off from home for several weeks every spring. The year before, Tarl had solemnly informed her that his elder brother, who was a rancher in an adjoining county, was so ill that three doctors did not expect him to live through the summer. Bessie had reluctantly consented to Tarl's leaving home even though she knew that if he actually did go to see his brother, he would make no more than a token visit for a few hours, and then spend the remainder of the time fishing in Friday River. Tarl was away from home for three and a half weeks that
time.
The year before that, Tarl had told Bessie that he had promised on his word of honour to travel around the county and electioneer for a first cousin who was running for re-election to a local political office. Tarl did speak about the election to two or three men he saw on the street, and immediately after that he hurried to Friday River and the lean-to in the chaparral. There had always been some such excuse that had enabled him to leave home in the spring of the year to fish, but this time Bessie was determined that there would be no excuse he could possibly think of that would cause her to change her mind.
"You're not leaving this house one step tomorrow, or any other day this spring and summer, Tarl Pricehouse," Bessie told him sternly. "I've had enough of it, along with all the flimsy excuses you think you can fool me with, and from now on, no matter what you think up, you're not going to do it. I've made up my mind, and that's final."
"Now, Bessie," Tarl said in an ingratiating manner, "That's no way for a fine woman like you to talk. It don't sound like your real self at all."
"It's not going to do you a bit of good to sit there and think you can cajole me into changing my mind," she told him with harsh finality. "When my mind's made up, it stays made up."
Tarl, silent after that, stared straight ahead at the little shed on the other side of the yard.
"What've you got in that bean sack?”she asked suspiciously after a while.
"Well, nothing much to speak of, Bessie. It's just some odds and ends I got together and thought I ought to keep in the sack so I'd know for sure where to find them when needed."
"Then you might just as well start putting odds and ends back where they came from, because you're not walking off from this house tomorrow or any other day to go fishing, and not come back till goodness knows when. You've gone off this last time, Tarl Pricehouse. You're going to stay home this spring and summer and mow the grass in the front yard when it's needed twice a week, and spend the rest of the time keeping the pig weeds out there in the back yard chopped down. Those pig weeds are a disgrace, growing headhigh like they do all summer long, and you're going to stay here and chop them down as fast as they stick up out of the ground. If I can wear out my body and soul working in that steam laundry month after month and year after year so I can put food on the table and clothes on our backs, you can stay here like you ought to and keep those mortifying pig weeds chopped down. Every summer those disgraceful pig weeds mortify me. Every last one of the neighbors knows you've been going off and shirking your duty, while I'm slaving body and soul at the steam laundry. Now, you remember that."
Bessie went into the kitchen and, with a noisy clatter of pots and pans, began cooking supper. While she was out of sight, Tarl hurried to the shed and got a handful of lead sinkers he had hidden there and had almost forgot to take to Friday River with him when he left the next morning.
Supper was ready before dark, and Bessie came to the door and called him to the table. They sat and ate in silence for nearly half an hour. When both had finished, Bessie leaned across the table and patted his hand affectionately.
"I don't want you to feel bad, Tarl," she said comfortingly. "I'm going to make up for it some way. You just wait and see if I don't. It's always been my nature to treat you good. Now, you just go ahead and make up your mind to stay at home this time, and you'll find that you'll be just as happy and content here at home with me as you would be all by yourself out there in the chaparral."
"I'll do some thinking about what you just said, Bessie," he promised without enthusiasm. "I sure will. I won't forget what you said."
Tarl went to the front porch and took off his shoes and sat in the purple twilight while Bessie was washing the dishes. Later, she came to the porch and drew a chair close to his and sat down. They sat for a long time listening to the noisy crickets and the night birds in the trees.
"A funny thing happened a little while ago, Bessie,"Tarl remarked presently. "It's the queerest thing that ever struck me."
"What was it, Tarl?" she asked drowsily.
He cleared his throat significantly.
"That's pretty hard to say, because I never had this very same thing happen to me before in my whole livelong life, and that makes it hard to explain in a plain way."
He waited patiently for Bessie to question him further, hoping her interest had been aroused, but she sat placidly beside him as though nothing in the world could surpass the pleasure of merely sitting beside him on the porch in the deepening purple twilight and listening to the chirping of the night bird in the trees.
"Bessie," he remarked, unable to wait any longer, and raising his voice more than usual, "Bessie, what came over me a while ago was like a vision. That's what it was — a vision!"
"A vision about what, Tarl?" she asked, moving slightly in the chair.
"Now, that's the peculiar thing, Bessie. I saw it as plain as day.
It was so plain I couldn't keep from noticing it."
"What was so plain, Tarl?"
He was sure he had detected in her voice the first faint note of interest.
"Well, while you were out there in the kitchen a while ago, I saw all the money I'd ever want in the whole world, and it was hidden in a particular place."
"I've often dreamed of us getting a lot of money, Tarl," she remarked after a moment's pause. "I've dreamed of it a lot of times, asleep and awake. Wouldn't it be wonderful — if a dream like that came true?"
"Well, that's just it, Bessie. I've got a hunch4 that what I saw in the vision is bound to come true."
"Where'd this vision take place, Tarl?"
"Out there in the chaparral," he said quickly, "about nine or ten miles from town, more or less."
"Right spang5 at Friday River!" Bessie said severely, her whole attitude changing.
"That's right," he admitted, turning and looking at her "How'd you know that, Bessie?"
"Because I know the scheme you're fixing up in your mind, that's why. And I don't need a vision to see it, either. You have been sitting out here all this time thinking up an excuse to get to Friday River, and stay out there by yourself in that lean-to for the next two or three weeks, or longer. But you’re not going one step, Tarl Pricehouse!"
"But what I said was only a little, small part of it, Bess. If you'd let me tell you more about —."
She got up, not saying another word, and walked heavily into the house, slamming the screen door behind her. Tarl sat glumly in the growing darkness and wondering how Bessi could possibly have known what he was talking about. Just before bedtime, wearing her pink floral wrapper, Bessie came back to the porch and sat down in the chair beside him. She was quiet for only a few moments.
"I don't want to believe a word you said about seeing a vision, Tarl," she said, moving nervously in the chair, "but I just can't get my mind rid of it." She leaned towards him.
"Did you really and truly see a vision of hidden money somewhere?"
"More real money than I ever saw before in my whole livelong life, Bessie," he told her fervently.
Bessie sighed deeply.
"You're the biggest wrapper of the truth6 that ever walked the earth, Tarl Pricehouse, but I've lived with you so long I'm afraid to trust my own good sense any more. It would be just like you to find a heap of hidden money somewhere — even out at Friday River — and I 'd feel like a fool if I wasn't on hand to claim my share of it, after slaving body and soul like I have all these years at the steam laundry." She paused briefly to get her breath. "Tarl, can you recall the exact spot where you saw all that hidden money in your vision?"
"I'm trying my level best7 right this minute to recollect the exact spot, Bessie," he told her with all the earnestness he could summon. "And I'm not the kind of fellow who'd locate all that money, and then run off with another woman. No, sir! I'd make it a point to bring it straight home as soon as I located it. I'm clear8 loyal
to the end, Bessie. The main thing is I need the peace and quiet of the chaparral, where you don't see a living soul from one day to the next, to bring the vision back to me again so I can locate the very exact spot where the money's hidden. That's why I'm thinking I ought to go out there to Friday River the first thing tomorrow morning, so I'll be more apt to recollect better and faster."
"I don't see why you can't bring back the vision right here in Maverick, instead of out at Friday River," she said.
"The fact is, Bessie, as near as I can make out, the exact hiding place is right at Friday River, or mighty close to it. I ought to be there handy to it when I persuade the vision to come back again and give me foolproof directions for finding it. That way, I wouldn't lose a bit of time locating the money. It's not like I was fixing to go off for good and ever, Bessie. Why! The whole thing might come back to me overnight, this week or some other. You never can predict about visions. They come and go when they get ready to of their own accord. And when it does come back, and if it's clear and clean-cut and foolproof, I'll let you know about it as fast as I can send word to you. You can rely on that, Bessie." "Tarl?" she asked hopefully, "do you really and truly think there's a good chance of your recalling it to mind while I'm still alive to benefit from it?"
"I don't know a single, solitary reason why it wouldn't come back during your lifetime, Bessie," he told her, "unless it just naturally wants to be contrary."
"Tarl," she asked, excitedly catching her breath, "Tarl, how much money was there? Altogether, I mean. Did you have a chance to count some of it when you saw the vision the first time?"
"As near as I can recollect now, there must've been a heap of it. It was all in those big bills, and I've always had a dickens9 of a time counting the big bills. I can count small change and one-dollar bills with no trouble at all, but the big bills always did stump11 me."
"How big, Tarl?" she begged urgently. "Ten-dollar bills? Twenty-dollar bills?"
"Oh, bigger than that, Bessie," he said without hesitation.
"Hundred-dollar bills, at least."
"Was the money hidden in a bucket, or in a box, or in what, Tarl?"
“Let's see, now," he said slowly, rubbing his neck. "Let's see if I can recollect that part about it." He continued rubbing his neck thoughtfully. Bessie moved to the edge of her chair. "No," he said firmly after a while, "no, it wasn't in anything like that at all. It was hidden in something with a peculiar shape, though. I recollect that part about it. It was sort of oblong. Like a — like a — "
"Like a what, Tarl?" she asked, gripping his arm. Tarl slowly shook his head. "Now I've gone and clear forgot. But the money was there. A heap of it. I know that, for sure."
It was colored green, wasn't it?" she asked helpfully.
"That's right. It was real green money12," all right I couldn't be wrong about that part."
"Was it buried under one of those stunted black-bark trees in the chaparral?" she asked. "Or was it buried under a bridge, or something like that? Try to think real hard, Tarl! Try like you've never tried before in all your whole life!"
"Something like that," he replied after a brief pause.
"Something like what?" she demanded anxiously. "Think hard, Tarl! Think like you've never thought before!"
"I have to let my mind dwell on it a while before I could let myself say for sure," he told her, beginning to feel weary of her persistent questioning. "That's something I'd want to be sure to recollect, when the time comes, and I'd hate to scare it away by rushing it too fast. Visions always like to take their own good time
about coming and going."
"But what if you recalled what it was buried in, and then couldn't recall the place where it was hidden, exactly?"
"That's when I'm going to set myself to try my hardest to recollect," he assured her.
Tarl could hear Bessie, thoroughly exhausted, sigh as she sank backward in the chair, and he got up and felt on the floor for his shoes. When he found the shoes, he slipped them on and then went into the house. He undressed in the dark and stretched out comfortably on the bed with mind and body fully at ease for the first
time that day. He was certain now that he had succeeded in persuading Bessie to let him leave the house the next morning. Finally, when he was ready to go to sleep, he realized that Bessie still had not come to bed, but he was too drowsy to wait for her any longer.
He was wide awake an hour before dawn. He lay quietly for a while, reminding himself not to disturb Bessie; however, just when he was ready to get up and dress, he discovered that Bessie was not in bed beside him. Without waiting a second longer, he dressed hastily and, carrying his shoes in his hands, tiptoed through the hall and went out the back door. Sitting down on the kitchen steps, he put
on his shoes and laced them securely. Then he went across the back yard to the shed and got the bean sack. He could see the first pale streak of dawn over the horizon as he started around the house to the front yard, and he was confident that as soon as he walked across town to the highway, he would be able to get a ride to Friday River in one of the trucks that would be going in that direction.
As he hurried around the corner of the house, he walked head on into Bessie. He had no idea how long she had been waiting there at the corner of the house, but he knew at once that she had been waiting for him.
"Bessie, you've just got to let me go out there and try to recollect that vision so I can dig up all that money in hiding," he told her desperately. "I'm doing it as much for you as I am for — "
Bessie had turned and was walking towards the street. She no longer had on the floral wrapper; she was fully dressed, and was even wearing one of her hats. In the pale light of dawn he could see that she was carrying a small satchel that had been packed tightly with clothing, and there was no doubt that she planned to be away from home for a long time.
"Hurry up, Tarl," she called back to him, urgently motioning for him to catch up with her. "Let's don't waste another minute getting out there where the money's hidden. I couldn't sleep a wink all last night for fearing that somebody else might have the same vision you had, and go dig up the money before we can get to it. That's why I sat up all night, waiting for dawn to come, so we'd be the first to get to Friday River. Hurry now, Tarl"
Tarl swung the bulging bean sack over his shoulder and, silently enduring the swinging pain of disappointment, walked despondently down the street behind Bessie in the pale dawn. Bessie, already far ahead of him, turned and warned him that he would have to hurry more than he was doing if he expected to keep up with her.
NOTES
1. chaparral:a thicket of dwarf-oaks, shrubs, thorny bushes, etc.
2. lean-to:a shed with a roof that slopes only in one way and which rests against a tree or the wall of a building.
3. the Gulf: the Gulf of Mexico
4. hunch(Am.E. colloq.): a strong feeling that smth. is going to happen
5. spang(colloq.}: directly, straight
6. wrapper of the truth:a person who distorts the truth, a euphemism for "liar"
7. level best(colloq.): the best one can do
8. clear(colloq.): completely, all the way
9. dickens(colloq.): a mild substitute for "devil"
10. stump(colloq.): to puzzle; to baffle
11. green money:United States paper money
EXERCISES
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